The Land of Thai

There are three distinct seasons in Thailand: “wet,” “hot,” and “not as hot.” For being such a shy, conservative country, these sexually suggestive descriptions seem a bit out of place to me. But I’m sure they’re fitting. Like sex, however, I don’t find each season to be mutually exclusive. We are now in the beginning of the wet season, which will last through October, the entire duration of my time here. To me, though, this season is more than wet: it’s hot, it’s sticky, it’s passionate, it’s thriving. This season is sex with a gorgeous, fascinating new lover on a Saturday night, of whose scent you can’t rid yourself even after ten hot showers.

My coordinators at school would turn crimson at reading this, thereby undoing the hours they’ve spent rubbing themselves with skin whitening lotion. My students, though they probably wouldn’t understand the comparison, would giggle at seeing the word “sex,” an English word that even the M1 students know and repeat liberally. Too bad I can’t use this description in a lesson plan; the students would never view their seasons the same way again.

Riding my bike home from school each day, receiving stares, “hello!”s, and incessant giggles from children and adults alike, makes me wonder if the Thais see my interpretation of the season behind my dark sunglasses and sweat. My fears are probably unfounded; they are looking at a fair-haired farang who, like a celebrity, has come into their town unannounced and caused quite a stir simply by going to the local market to buy a coffee. I’ve been followed into bathrooms by young girls who giggle outside my stall until I emerge. I’ve been told I’m “beautiful” by older coworkers who have stared at my hair and skin admiringly. They’re taking in the novelty of The Foreigner rather than the person behind the appearance. At times it’s quite flattering. But then I think, what have I done to deserve this attention? Other than being born and coming to their country to teach a few key English phrases to their children, while trying to fulfill some selfish quest of self-discovery? I guess, just as the weather in Thailand is alluring and sensual, my existence in Phanom Sarakham is equally sexy to my town. My scent, though, is not as strong on them as theirs is on me. Not yet, anyway.